Thank you everyone for the encouragement!
I want to update from what i last said in my blog the other day...
the truth is, I love our church. it's small, and it has its faults, but it is a home for us right now.
the truth is I am very insecure! and every sunday, i push my insecurity down and "suck it up and get it over with"!
and sometimes in the middle of the week, my insecurity catches up to me, and i just...."blow up."
not ideal, but that's just how i am.
i apologize for what i said, and how i said it, and if you were made uncomfortable or upset, i apologize.
i really am fine, and i really do love our body and the people there.
i AM struggling to fit in, but that's more my fault as anyone elses!
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